Attending a wake is a somber occasion, and choosing the right attire shows respect for the deceased and their loved ones. This guide provides practical advice on what to wear to a wake, considering cultural norms, weather, and venue.
What is a Wake?
A wake is a gathering held to honor and remember a deceased person before the funeral. It is typically a more informal event than the funeral itself, allowing friends and family to come together, share memories, and offer condolences. The attire for a wake can vary depending on cultural customs, location, and the wishes of the deceased’s family.
What Colors Are Appropriate for a Wake?
Traditionally, people wear dark colors like black, navy, or gray to a wake. These colors are considered respectful and appropriate for mourning. However, some cultures or families may request different attire, such as white or a specific color that had special meaning to the deceased. It’s always best to follow any specific dress code mentioned by the family.
| Color | Significance | When to Wear |
|---|---|---|
| Black | Traditional color of mourning | Most wakes unless otherwise specified |
| Navy | Respectful and formal | Suitable alternative to black |
| Gray | Neutral and understated | Appropriate for informal wakes |
| White | Symbol of purity in some cultures | When specified by the family |
| Earth Tones | Warm and subdued | Less formal, depending on family preference |
General Guidelines for Choosing Wake Attire
When selecting what to wear to a wake, consider these general guidelines to ensure your clothing is appropriate:
Keep It Simple and Respectful
- Avoid flashy or bright colors: Stay away from bright, eye-catching colors like red, yellow, or neon shades.
- Opt for conservative styles: Choose clothing that is modest, with no bold patterns or large logos.
- Choose comfortable clothing: Wakes can last several hours, so wear something that allows you to sit, stand, and move around comfortably.
Dress According to the Venue
The location of the wake can also influence your attire. Here are some tips based on different venues:
- At a Funeral Home or Church: Traditional attire, such as a dark suit or dress, is appropriate.
- At a Family Home: Slightly less formal clothing, like a dress shirt and trousers or a simple dress, may be acceptable.
- Outdoors or Casual Venues: Consider the weather and terrain, opting for shoes and clothing suitable for the environment.
Appropriate Attire for Men
Men attending a wake should aim for a look that is respectful and understated. Here are some recommended clothing options:
- Dark Suit: A dark suit, preferably black, navy, or gray, with a plain dress shirt and tie.
- Dress Shirt and Trousers: A long-sleeved dress shirt with trousers is acceptable if a full suit is too formal.
- Footwear: Black or brown dress shoes are most appropriate. Avoid sneakers, sandals, or overly casual footwear.
- Outerwear: In colder weather, a dark-colored coat or jacket is suitable.
Men’s Wake Attire Options
| Item | Examples | Comments |
|---|---|---|
| Suit | Black, navy, gray | Traditional and most formal |
| Shirt and Trousers | White or light-colored shirt, dark trousers | Less formal, still appropriate |
| Shoes | Black or brown dress shoes | Avoid sneakers or casual shoes |
| Outerwear | Dark coat or jacket | Suitable for colder weather |
| Accessories | Minimal jewelry, simple tie | No flashy or distracting accessories |
Appropriate Attire for Women
Women have several options when choosing attire for a wake, but the key is to maintain a conservative, respectful appearance. Consider the following:
- Dark Dresses or Skirts: Dresses or skirts in black, navy, or dark colors that are knee-length or longer.
- Blouses and Trousers: A modest blouse paired with dark trousers is another good option.
- Footwear: Closed-toe shoes like flats, loafers, or low-heeled pumps. Avoid sandals or shoes with bright colors.
- Outerwear: A dark coat or cardigan is appropriate for colder weather.
- Minimal Jewelry: Keep accessories minimal and subtle, avoiding flashy or large pieces.
Women’s Wake Attire Options
| Item | Examples | Comments |
|---|---|---|
| Dress or Skirt | Knee-length or longer, dark colors | Conservative and respectful |
| Blouse and Trousers | Dark trousers, simple blouse | Modest and appropriate for all venues |
| Shoes | Flats, loafers, low-heeled pumps | Comfortable and understated |
| Outerwear | Dark coat or cardigan | Suitable for colder weather |
| Accessories | Minimal jewelry, small purse | No large or flashy accessories |
Special Considerations for Wake Attire
- Summer Wakes: Opt for lighter fabrics like cotton or linen while maintaining a conservative style. Dark colors are still preferred, but consider lighter shades if appropriate.
- Winter Wakes: Layer with a dark-colored coat, scarf, or gloves. Make sure footwear is suitable for any weather conditions, such as rain or snow.
Cultural and Religious Customs
Different cultures and religions may have specific customs regarding wake attire. For example:
- Catholic Wakes: Typically follow traditional guidelines with dark, conservative clothing.
- Jewish Wakes (Shiva): Conservative dress is required; dark colors are common but not always necessary.
- Hindu Wakes: White is traditionally worn as a symbol of purity.
- Buddhist Wakes: Often prefer white clothing or muted colors.
What Not to Wear to a Wake
To show proper respect, avoid wearing the following:
- Bright Colors: Neon or bright colors can seem disrespectful.
- Casual or Athletic Wear: Avoid jeans, T-shirts, shorts, and athletic shoes.
- Revealing or Tight Clothing: Clothing that is too revealing or tight-fitting is not appropriate.
- Flashy Accessories: Large jewelry, bright scarves, or loud patterns can distract from the solemnity of the occasion.
Conclusion
Choosing the right attire for a wake is an important way to show respect to the deceased and their loved ones. Opt for dark, conservative clothing that is appropriate for the venue, weather, and any specific cultural or family customs. Always prioritize simplicity, modesty, and respect in your clothing choices to honor the solemnity of the occasion.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
Here are some frequently asked questions given below:
Can I Wear Jeans to a Wake?
Jeans are generally not considered appropriate attire for a wake. However, if the wake is more casual or the family has requested informal clothing, dark, plain jeans without rips or embellishments might be acceptable.
What Should I Wear to a Wake in the Summer?
In summer, opt for lightweight fabrics like cotton or linen in dark colors. A modest dress, skirt, or trousers with a simple blouse is a good choice. Avoid bright colors and choose comfortable, closed-toe shoes.
Is It Appropriate to Wear White to a Wake?
White is traditionally worn in some cultures, such as Hindu or certain Christian customs. If the family requests white clothing, it is respectful to comply. Otherwise, dark colors are more commonly accepted.
Can I Wear a Short Dress to a Wake?
Short dresses are generally not recommended unless they are knee-length or longer and modest in style. Avoid dresses with low necklines or revealing cuts.
Do Children Need to Follow the Same Dress Code?
Yes, children should also dress conservatively and respectfully. Choose simple, dark clothing for them, such as a dress or trousers and a shirt, avoiding bright colors and casual wear.